(Music plays in the background. The “Street Couch” band logo appears on screen and fades out.)
(Lou pops up on the right, yelling. The music comes to a sudden stop. The screen shakes. The background is black.)
Lou: Stop! Everyone stop!
(The black background fades into the practice area.)
(Josie looks annoyed.)
Lou: Alex, you were supposed to come in there.
(Alex joins, looking confused.)
Alex: Are you sure?
Lou: I wrote the song; yes, I’m sure.
Alex: I thought we played the intro one more time.
Lou: No. It goes “dun dun dun dun tsss” and then you start singing.
Josie: How descriptive.
(Josie exits right.)
Lou: You also started on the wrong note.
(Alex looks disappointed.)
Lou: Your voice is great, but, dude, your guitar playing is atrocious.
Alex: Thanks Lou!
Lou: Do you want me to give you some lessons or something?
Alex: Nah, you have lots of other stuff to do. I don’t want to bother you with it.
Lou: Well you’re going to need to show some huge improvement before next practice.
(Alex smiles, joking.)
Alex: What, are you going to kick me out of the band again?
Alex: Nah, you like me too much.
Lou: Alex, you have to start taking this seriously. We might have the biggest show of our lives coming up. Everything has to be perfect.
Alex: I’ve been practicing for hours every day, and I’ve been listening to your old demos in the car. I’m trying, Lou. I’m seriously serious.
(Lou looks insulted.)
L: You don’t even have a car.
(Lou exits right, following Josie.)
A: He’s right.
(Alex is left looking dejected. Reid enters from the left.)
Reid: If I hear you fuck up one more time, I’m cutting your fingers off.
(Reid exits right.)
A: I need those.
(Lou is excited. Josie is still looking annoyed.)
Lou: They have one spot left, Josie. One.
Josie: Yeah, we’ve been over this.
Lou: I mean, it’s a miracle! A once in a lifetime opportunity! Bands never drop out of festivals. Now that Set it Straight is out, this is our chance. They need someone to fill the spot, and we need a show.
Lou: And Bucket Guzzler got in on the lineup. Bucket Guzzler. Those guys suck.
Josie: They really do.
Lou: So why not us? Why shouldn’t they pick us?
(Reid enters left.)
Reid: Is he still obsessing over that music festival?
Lou: I contacted the guy who’s running the thing and told him we would fill the open spot. It’s been a week with no answer and I’m really starting to stress... Funny, the guy didn’t even put his name up on the website. (Lou looks excited) Maybe it’s a producer looking for bands to sign! Could you imagine?! Street Couch and EMI Records!
Reid: There won’t be a Street Couch if the boy wonder doesn’t know how to play any damn songs.
Lou: If he doesn’t learn them in time, I’ll just step in.
Josie: And break his fragile heart?
Reid: Or a fan’s nose, if it goes anything like the last time you played.
Lou: I was drunk!
Reid: You’re not supposed to get sloppy drunk at a show.
Lou: Look at history. All the great rock and roll artists were sloppy drunk at shows!
Josie: You’re not a great rock and roll artist.
Reid: Look, can I leave now? I’ve got things to do.
Lou: No, we need to run through our setlist at least two more times.
Reid: Are you kidding?
(Lou’s phone rings.)
Lou: It’s work. Gotta take this.
(Lou exits right.)
(Josie immediately smiles and becomes less irritated.)
Josie: So why are you trying to rush out of here today? Do you have a hot date waiting for you?
(Reid cracks a little smile and winks.)
Reid: No, that’s Tuesday.
Josie: Oh, of course.
Reid: I wish it were something more interesting, but I have some work obligations to take care of.
Josie: I don’t understand you and Lou with all your “work obligations.” The only work obligation I have is smiling when I’m asked what the Dinner Special is.
Reid: Should’ve gone to college, sweetheart.
(Josie looks angry.)
Josie: I have a degree, jackass.
Reid: In pouring refills of iced tea?
Josie: Business administration, thank you very much!
Reid: Then why don’t you get a better job?
Josie: The job market is terrible right now, haven’t you noticed?
Reid: Are you sure you don’t just have your head up your ass with that little fashion design dream of yours?
(Josie looks upset.)
Josie: I don’t have my head up my ass. It’s just a hobby.
Reid: But you want to make it a career one day? Success rate in that industry is low.
Josie: Would you stop it with the invasive questions?
Reid: Hey, you were the one asking about my hot date.
(Josie looks mischievous.)
Josie: So you do have one!
R: … CHOICE 1
1.1. Flirt - “Are you jealous?”
1.2. Laugh it off “I’ve got a hot date with a pile of paperwork.”
C1 - FLIRT
Reid1: Are you jealous?
Josie1: Me, jealous? Hah!
Reid1: Could’ve fooled me.
Josie1: Well maybe just a little. (Josie winks.)
Reid1: We could fix that. Just you, me, and a bottle of wine, underneath the stars...
Josie1: Enticing me with liquor?
Reid1: You’d never turn down a free drink.
Josie1: You know me well.
Reid1: And you certainly wouldn’t turn down a night under the stars with this. (Reid smirks.)
(Josie looks mischievous.)
Josie1: You certainly think highly of yourself.
Reid1: Just pick a night, babe.
(Alex enters. He looks confused.)
(Josie and Reid immediately blush.)
Alex1: I picked a weird time to walk in.
Josie1: Uh, yeah you did. Anyway…
C2 - LAUGH IT OFF
Reid2: I’ve got a hot date with a pile of paperwork. No better way to spend a Thursday evening.
Josie2: You must really love work.
Reid2: Oh yeah. If I could work day and night I would.
Josie2: Too bad you have to stop and make time for us every week. (Josie winks.)
(Alex enters from left, stands middle. He looks excited.)
Alex2: Hey guys!
Reid2: The boy wonder is back.
CHOICE 1 OVER
Josie: Sorry we gave you a hard time earlier, Alex. Everyone fucks up sometimes. Plus, I think you’ve really improved a lot since last month.
Alex: Thanks! I’ve been practicing my ass off... I just wish Lou would notice.
Josie: I’m sure he has, but he’s just been stressed out about the music fest.
Alex: Who isn’t stressed about it?!
Reid: Not me.
Alex: If I knew my parts as well as you know yours, I wouldn’t be worried either.
(Reid looks irritated.)
Reid: It has nothing to do with knowing the parts. We’re a mediocre band inside and out. Who gives a shit if the thing is run by some big-name label guys? There’s no way in hell they’d even think of signing us.
(Alex starts looking irritated too.)
Alex: You’re thinking about it all wrong! If we do our best, we’re bound to get noticed by somebody! Even if we only get a couple of new fans, it’s worth playing.
Reid: You’re not fucking serious. We sound like garbage - we have a singer who doesn’t know when to come in and has the musical abilities of a toddler and a manager who has no clue what he’s doing. And to top it off, the name of our band is Street Couch.
(Josie looks mad after Reid starts talking.)
Alex: Lou knows what he’s doing! He’s trying to get us into a sold-out music festival.
Reid: Only because another band dropped out. A good manager would’ve tried to get us in before the lineup was announced.
Josie: Would you guys just stop?
Reid: We suck, and you should realize that instead of getting your hopes up over nothing. Even if we happen to make it into the festival, we are going nowhere. We are not good, and we have never been good. We will never be good.
Josie: Why are you even in the band, Reid?
(Reid opens his mouth to answer, but before he can Lou comes in.)
(Lou looks disheveled and excited. Reid is still mad.)
Alex: Why are you so greasy?
Lou: You know how I stepped outside to take a call from work, right?!
(Josie looks annoyed.)
Josie: Um, yes.
Lou: Well my boss started talking about our new digital marketing campaign and asked me to check my email to make sure I received the files he sent over. And when I looked, guess what was in my inbox?!
Josie: The files.
Lou: AND an email response from the guy running the festival!
Alex: What did he say?
Lou: That he would love to have Street Couch play the Sad Boy Music Festival.
(Josie and Reid look shocked.)
Alex: NO WAY!
Lou: It gets better.
Alex: How could it get any better?
Lou: He wants to meet us for lunch tomorrow!
Lou: Am I the greatest manager or what?
Josie: That’s amazing!
Reid: I’m… shocked.
Lou: Josie! Can you hook us up with the best table at your restaurant?
Josie: There's not a single nice table in that place, but sure.
Alex: Wait, why does he want to meet us?
Lou: He didn’t say, but guys, how cool is this?!
Alex: Wait! What if he’s a music producer who wants to sign us?
Lou: That was what I thought!
Reid: Nobody is going to sign us.
Lou: We need to finish practice, like now. We need to nail this if we’re going to get signed.
Reid: Oh, come on!