Since 1966...
What Chuck was doing...
From: Chuck Darling
December 4th, 2023
Re: Since 1966
I was an Altar boy
at St. Mary's Parish
Arcade, NY
in 1966... (Click on Images...)
During the summer, I unloaded hay wagons
for comic book money (25 cents/load)
In 1972, I began
leading folk music
at Mass.
Easter Vigil Mass (1975)
(Corky Mach: Celebrant)
I was a Discussions Leader
at 18, working with
Adult Catholics at St. Gerard's
RC Church in Buffalo, NY.,
where I met my Best Man,
Robert Valentine Hanzlian,
who was in my discussion
group, with his wife Mary.
St. Gerard's was a vibrant
Faith community of 1200
Families .
Urban Renewal of
Downtown Buffalo
sent the Chippewa St
Red Light District
3 miles out to the
edge of the East Side.
Where St. Gerard's stood.
I did music at St. Gerard's
for 20 years...
Rampant crime caused
an acceleration of
Neighborhood decay.
The Buffalo Diocese
Closed St. Gerard's,
eventually selling it
to Muslims.
Wiki says it's
currently abandoned.
St. Rose of Lima
St. Rose First Communion
I would provide the music.
* Link: O Jesu :Nativity Choir
at Rehersal
* I'm singing Bass...
* (My Mother, Gloria,("Aunt Gloria") sang
* Soprano)
* Link: Nativity Choir
Recorded at Mass
Feast of Christ the King
Sony Cassette Recorder
* I'm singing Bass...
* (My Mother, Gloria, ("Aunt Gloria") sang
* Soprano)
I did music on
the altar of
St Rose of Lima,
for ten years.
I wrote these in LA
Played on Ukulele, and sung.
Recorded outside on phone.
I wrote this about 1997 in Buffalo:
- This is the Yamaha FG335 that I played in church for 30 years...
- I taught myself from Lightfoot Albums
MaryAnn of Helen Schwann's 9am folk group taught me to sing harmonies, and
recommended Lightfoot to me.
***
Here are my notes
from St Gerard's 1975:
This was from an 8 night seminar
called Mission 75, it was created
by Corky Mach and Ginger Infantino,
based upon the Cursillo movement,
and Charismatic Renewal prayer meetings.
Mission '75 October 12,1975
______________________________
First Night, Opening talk. (from the personal notes of Chuck Darling, age 18)
Father Joe Sharmach - 'Why Renewal?'
Why do we need Renewal?
What are we doing here at Mission '75?
Let's renew what was begun at Vatican II!
Let's implement and put into effect the results of Vatican II!
We are on the road to the New Pentacost!
What could happen if we do this?
We could stop looking at a parish as a spiritual filling station!
Instead, it will become a community of worshippers working together in a family situation!
How do we treat worship?
We should stop looking at Mass as an obligation!
We should stop coming to Mass as private individuals!
Instead, we should come together to pray as God's Family!
Not just the priest, but also the congregation should have an active part!
When we sing at Mass, we should really pray what we sing!
We must involve ourselves spiritually, and emotionally!
Joy, friendship, and other human elements must be experienced deeply, along with the spiritual significance of the Mass!
The people of Saint Gerard's must become very involved with scripture study!
Old Testament: Psalms,Songs...
New Testament: Gospels, Acts,Letters...
We now have a new awareness of the power and presence of Jesus, and The Holy Spirit!
The Church gives us a pagentry of European religious tradition!
The Eucharist should be the center!
Surrounding this center are Charisms, and the Gifts of the Holy Spirit!
We must strive to know Jesus, and His Love, and the power and wisdom of The Holy Spirit!
Often, we keep our light hidden...
Christ says to let our light shine to all men!
We need to reach out to the parish, and the community, and show them God's Love!
Why do we renew?
It is a mystery of the realization of the Love of GOD!
Our Mission is the SPIRITUAL RENEWAL OF THE AMERICAN PARISH!
Our faith gives us freedom, and openness to experience Christ!
Our parishioners seem to feel unworthy of being touched by Christ!
Let's change this!
Spiritual Renewal is progressive!
Dogmas are not as important as what God really means to us!
We must share our faith and union with Christ!
We know that Mission '75 will be a very moving experience for all of you, and we hope that it will continue to renew, until the entire parish has been renewed!
This can only be done through Christ, and the guidance of The Holy Spirit!
We can't do it alone!
Mission '75 ,October 12,
Jean Brown
Mission '75 October 12,1975
________________________________
First Night, Second talk. (from the personal notes of Chuck Darling, age 18)
Parish Secretary, Jean Brown, mother of seven. - 'What is Renewal?'
What is Renewal?
an awakening.
a new perspective.
I lived in fear.
Fear of making mistakes.
Fear of being involved.
Fear of God as a punisher.
I tied myself in a pretzel emotionally while I was praying.
I was doing my duty as a Catholic.
I had an attitude of self sufficience.
Doing 'duty' to neighbors.
Don't get involved!
Worry and fear immobilized me!
I was self centered.
I lost friends due to anti-social behavior.
I pre-judged people.
I was not aware of anything wrong!
The beginning of my spiritual awakening came through a Protestant woman, whose life was based on the certainty that what was given away would be replaced by God.
Twelve years ago, I came to Saint Gerard's.
I joined CFM. (Christian Family Movement)
CFM almost blew my faith out of me!
This was due to my rigidity of belief in the Baltimore Catechism.
I lost the meaning of life, and my hope!
I fought for almost two years. I felt I might have to leave the Church to hang onto Jesus!
I promised myself that I would not come back to CFM, but The Holy Spirit kept drawing me back!
My faith began to emerge as my own!
Jesus became my Friend, and Brother...
I stopped fearing God!
I began trying out new prayer forms, and I read new religious literature.
I realized, we don't have to defend God against scientific truth!
I now felt alive, with new revelations! All the faiths were there, now with new facets!
I now trust God!
Faith isn't faith, if it isn't chosen!
God is being revealed to us every day!
Love, pure and simple, from the Father, channeled through Jesus and CFM.
I began to realize what Love is in CFM!
I made Cursillo!
I had excitement in finding Him in others!
I could share their joys, and sorrows!
I had made a complete about-face in my attitude!
I discovered that I could trust other Christian Communities, simply through Christianity!
Reading the Word of God in new translations is an unlimited joy!
My appreciation of Liturgy was broadened and deepened!
Let's remember that it's us, not God, that demands perfection in Liturgy!
God can be all things to all people!
Let's be grateful that in our day, the number of ways to praise God has increased!
Jesus tells us not to be afraid!
Too often, we put our limitations on our Christianity!
We must remove these conditions.
Surrendering ourselves to others and God's will is humbling!
If we have not Love, we have nothing!
Reaching out to people is joyous!
It's great when our feelings coincide with God's Will, but they don't always!
Renewal is an ongoing process!
If we stand still, we will go backwards!
Prayer and reading!
In Jesus, there is always more!
Mission '75 ,October 13, Father John Aurelio,
Mission '75 October 13,1975
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Second Night: Monday : Theme 'Who Am I?' (from the personal notes of Chuck Darling, age 18)
Father John Aurelio
I was born in New York City.
I moved here, with my family, at age four.
We moved to Sicily for a year. When I returned, I attended school and minor Seminary here.
I received my Masters in
Psychiatric Social Work.
I was ordained a priest in 1966.
You may have heard of my 'Story Sunday' Masses.
What makes you the way you are?
God gave to man the power of procreation.
In America, we like to think of ourselves as rugged individualists, but you are more formed and shaped by the people around you than by you, yourselves.
There are three parts to a personality.
The Pleasure Principle
A basic instinctive need. This stage predominates from birth to 1-1/2 to 2 years of age.
-Feed Me -- Please Me -- Make Me Happy!
"I want what I want and I want it now!"
There is no morality here, just pure instinct.
Anytime you violate a Pleasure Principle, you get an emotional reaction!
This reaction is very strong when we're young!
The Rules Commitee
Toilet Training is the very first time rules are imposed on a child.
The rules become internalized behavior!
"Don't touch the Color Television Knobs!"
If you violate the Rules Commitee, you can expect an emotional reaction!
Almost everything you do in life is following rules.
Men are much more vehement about following rules!
Kick the dog syndrome.
Reason
It is the ability to make right decisions.
We think, we judge, we weigh, we decide.
All too often,parents stifle children by not allowing them to make decisions!
You've got to allow children to make decisions, or else they will be unable to make decisions as an adult!
Reason has no emotions.
Psychological Scars
Anxiety
an irrational, unreasonable fear of an unknown object.
Anxiety ridden people operate on Murphy's Law.
Defense Mechanisms for Psychological Scars
Phobia- irrational, unreasonable fear of a known object.
aquaphobia -fear of water.
The cause of Anxiety is nervous and anxious parents!
Guilt
The feeling of being morally bad.
Neurotic Guilt: - people who are forever knocking themselves.
Defense Mechanisms for Guilt
Scruples: Worry and feeling guilty about one thing. With Catholics, the biggie is sex.
How do people become Guilty?
through parents who are determined that their child will not be spoiled!
Inferiority Complex
feelings of inadequacy.
It comes up anytime a person faces a challenge.
It starts when you are very young, and all decisions were taken away from you.
The only way to get above these Principles is through Reason and Christ.
The one person who loves you exactly the way you are is God!
Mission '75 October 14,1975
________________________________
Third Night, Opening talk. (from the personal notes of Chuck Darling, age 18)
Reverend Bernard Mach - 'Who is Jesus?'
Speaker: Reverend Bernard Mach ('Corky') Associate pastor of St. Gerard's parish,
Bailey and Delavan Avenue, Buffalo,NY.
Note: Corky was the creator of the Mission ' 75 program of renewal, he left us
in February, 2004 to be with the Lord.)
________________________________
I was born in July, 1938.
I went to St. Luke's Parochial School.
I had trouble with bedwetting...
I had a mean sister at school...
I had a problem at school...and I wouldn't go back to kindergarten.
...
In the Seventh Grade, I played the part of a priest in a play.
I was pushed towards the seminary, but I wouldn't go!
I went to Canisius High School on a scholarship, and I quit after three days!
I wanted to go to Ken (Kensington High School), but my father made me go to Hutch Tech.
I had back trouble in High School, I was home for two weeks during Junior year.
I was bored to death!
My aunt gave me a prayer book, The Young Man's Guide.
I read it through boredom!
It had chapters titled "The Shield of Faith", and "The Helmet of Hope".
The last chapter was about the priesthood.
I decided on the priesthood!
I went to Our Lady of Angels Seminary for two years.
...I saw very little of Jesus.
I was ordained a priest.
I was always a choleric person...but no Jesus...
...
I went on retreat, and realized that I was stuck for life!
I made a Cursillo, and a dim light lit up...
I was sent here (to St. Gerard's)... and ... I. . . hated . . . it ! ! ! !
...
Father Wild was in charge of everything that interested ME!!!
My bitterness was so terrible!!!!
I asked Father Wild why he was so happy, and he said "You don't know how to pray!".
In May of 1972, I almost left the priesthood!
Of twenty-seven in my ordination class,
there were only eleven left!
I made Cursillo.
I wanted to drag everyone down to my level !
There was all this spooky stuff about God, and The Holy Spirit...
I thought, "...I must be the lousiest priest...".
...
I was in a group with fifteen people who knew how to pray, and I was leading them!
Peace and Joy descended upon me!
I had an appendectomy, but my peace lingered on!
I love beautiful surroundings, and I love when people rejoice!
...I hate crowds!
People were coming, and they weren't annoying me, as they did before!
...I loved being alone!
I asked the Lord to help me, and He did!
Now I know that if I turn to Jesus, He will help!
Anything I ask in Jesus Name, God will give me!
On a spiritual scale of 100, I am a 3, or a 4.
"Cork - I have called you by your name..."
Now I wouldn't quit even if the government persecuted us!
Now when people rejoice, I can be happy, and join them!
His Light is the Light that shines through the darkness, and the darkness will never extinguish it!
This Jesus is God! (as the Gospel of St. John tells us!)
He came to be with us, so we wouldnt have to be
moody, or tempermental, or mean to each other!
But, for this to happen, He must become a part of us !!!
He was right there, but it was so hard to see Him!
Many of us use excuses to keep ourselves out!
We want Him to come to us in the neat, packaged way of childhood,
... statues,... crosses,... the Eucharist.
...
He still pursued me!
I fled Him!
Finally, when you are so exhausted, you turn to find that He was the Hound of Heaven!
Even the Jews, His Chosen People, did not believe in Him!
Some of us have seen His glory!
I didn't know what a Bible was, and why Christ was killed!
He was killed because we couldn't stand to listen to His message!
" I don't need Him... till everything goes wrong!"
Take up your cross, and follow Him!
Sorrow and suffering can be transformed into Joy and Glory!
We can't be good on our own!
The only way we can be lifted up out of that baloney is through Jesus!
Jesus had to pray ! ! !
Most of prayer is listening.
Jesus took Peter, and lifted him up to a new life!
Remember the ship on the lake, the storm, Jesus walking on water, Peter walking on water, Peter sinking and crying for help, Jesus taking his hand, and lifting him up!!!
Why did Jesus come?
Jesus came because we need to be healed!
...We don't like to hear that we need healing.
Jesus comes, and wants to touch us.
We act as though there is no way out at all!
I know because I did this!
Monsignior Selbert's kindness was killing me!
(Note: Monsignior Selbert,"Shorty" was the well loved pastor of St. Gerard's. He went into retirement (although he remained in residence at St. Gerard's) when Father Joe Sharmach became the new pastor. Father Joe gave permission to hold the first Mission in 1975)
...
Jesus lifted me up!
God can and will lift us up!
"Come to me, all you who are burdened, and I will refresh you!"
We have to step out in faith, get out of the boat!
Let me tell you what faith is!
It's standing at the edge of a cliff, hearing "Walk on..." "Trust Me..."
and walking on...! ! !
If we know how to take care of our children,
how much more will Our Father in Heaven take care of us ?
We must Trust!
I remember when I first heard " I'm a born-again Christian".
... it...made...me...sick ! ! !
But now I see ! ! !
I'm doing less worrying.
The more you trust, let go,let the lord control your life...
the more He changes you!
The Lord touches you so gently...
"Don't be afraid... it is I... It's the Lord!"
There is a predisposition to faith.
"All right, Lord...You show me how ! ! !"
We have the same problems.
He knows how petty, and how noble we can be.
Jesus loves us exactly as we are ! ! !
Jesus is a living, loving person, who's saying ...
...
We kept Him so far away!
I feel so terrible with how I acted my first eight years in the priesthood!
We must learn how to talk to Him, and learn to listen!
Prayer isn't repetition of words... It's listening and talking!!!
Listening through the actions in our life, and through the Bible.
Sometimes we don't pray the way He taught us...
I used to be the Choir Director in the Seminary...
and I never prayed...
All of that crap that is hurting us so terribly...
is there because we do not read and live the Word of God!
I used to be a super-pouter!
I tell you as your brother in flesh that He can heal you!
If you let Him...
Jesus lifted me up!
God can and will lift us up!
"Come to me, all you who are burdened, and I will refresh you!"
We have to step out in faith, get out of the boat!
You must carry your cross, but it is easy next to Him!
"Where two or three come together in My Name... I will be among them!"
Don't be fools...
Don't be stupid...
Don't pass up this opportunity!
We've got to keep Him alive!
He's there, and He loves us!
Let Him come alive and touch you ! ! !
You have to keep Him, and His relationships alive ! ! !
" I am the Bread of Life, he who eats of me will live forever ! ! ! "
Instead of paying attention to Him...
We pay attention to garbage ! ! !
We spend most of our life worrying about garbage.
Christ is the only one who matters!
He is the only one who can bring us happiness!
______________________
Tragic Ending
of Two good priests.
Corky Mach was first
installed as parish priest
at St. Mary's in Arcade,
about a year before
I became an Altar boy
out there in the country.
Several years later,
Corky and John
had an A-frame cabin
built in the woods,
as a vacation retreat.
I helped build the cabin,
carrying a few 2x4s,
and hammering a few nails.
I was about ten years old,
and small for my age...
My friend John Clabeaux
used to delight in
elaborate practical jokes
to mock me...
The A-Frame had plywood
plates binding the roof at
the peak, so to mock me,
he took a carpenter's pencil
and boldly scripted
an elaborate
phony dedication on
the foremost binding plate.
______________________
This
structure
is consecrated
and lovingly dedicated
to:
The Mighty Chuck
Builder of men.
______________________
Corky and John would
occasionally visit us
at our Cottage, about
a quarter mile downhill
from their cabin.
My mother (a widow)
woulds serve them wine
or beer, when they visited.
Corky once remarked:
It's so COOL here !
It's always so HOT
in our cabin !
We never suspected
any bad behavior
from either of them...
whatever happened
happened...
News from 1993:
and...
The Diocese of Buffalo
Closed St. Gerard's
due to lack of
parishioners and
collection income.
The church campus
at Bailey & Delevan
had an 800 seat church,
with
a large Rectory...
a Convent...
a brick "Old School"
and a New School,
The Lyceum:
Complete with stage
and auditorium /gym...
(My former wife & I
were in a Musical
Dinner-Theater play
on that stage...
We were later married
by Corky, Joe Scharmach
and Joe Badding, at St. Gerard's.
our two children were baptised
there. I had met my wife
there at 9th grade Religious
Instructions.
I was confirmed there
by Bishop Edward Head.)
______________________
The Lyceum was complete
with Basketball Court
4 Bowling alleys,
a kitchen, and a bar
with beer on tap
for the Germanic Parish.
Men's groups like
The Knights of St John
(complete with swords
for ceremonial weddings...)
would play Euchre and
drink beer at the Lyceum
Bar/kitchen.
The Lyceum is where
Mission was held,
80 candidates at a time
for 8 consecutive nights
( Four hour sessions )
held Six times per year.
Above I have only documented
Mission talks for the first 3 nights ...
There were eight consecutive
nights to the Mission Seminar,
Sunday to Sunday, 6-10 pm.
There were masses held on
Tuesday and Thursday night,
and a Mass and a pot-luck dinner
on the closing Sunday, with the
80 candidates taking turns at
the microphone, to say whatever
they wanted.
The Dinner was attended by
candidates of prior Missions.
The Parish was renewed, and
people got to know each other..!
The Mission movement
spread to several other
Large Parishes, following
the Charismatic Movement,
and the
______________________
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