[A4F] [A4A] Encouragement from Your Best Friend - Making Changes This Year

by theHottieNextDoor

TAGS: [motivating] [support] [platonic] [friends] [practical] [persistence] [some weight loss references] [Slightly 4F] [ramble]

 

Author's Notes: A chat between best friends to motivate your year of change.  Support with some practical advise.  Pretty much generic advise for any change, but the default example is weight loss - change it up if you like. And other than clothes and flower references that might slant this toward a [F] listener, I think it's applicable for all.  

Thank you for reading! Do feel free to ad-lib or change to make this work for you.  I'd be so happy to hear any recordings! Sorry if there are any typos.

 

<suggested directions/notes are in brackets>

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So this is the year; you’re finally doing it!  Wow, that’s fantastic!  I’m so proud of you!  Just deciding to start is a big step! You already deserve mondo-props for that!

 

But I know there’s a lot ahead of you and it probably looks daunting. Or it might soon enough. So, I want to be here to help you; set you up for success so you can make it.  Make sure you have the tools you need.

 

Of course! What are best friends for?!  

 

Now granted, it may be impossible to talk about success without using a few cliches, but hey, some people seem to really believe in mantras...so, how bad can it be, right?

 

Now, I’m not saying curb your enthusiasm.  Of course you want to hold on to that for as long as you can.  Keep telling yourself that you can do this.  Our thoughts can deeply impact our actions and affirmations are important.  That whole ‘fake it til you make it’ expression isn’t total BS.  I promise.

 

But let’s be realistic about the path ahead of you.   Eventually you’re bound to hit a snag, start to feel discouraged, because that’s - that’s just life.  So let’s just acknowledge this right up front - CHANGE IS HARD!  And damn, if it doesn’t take time!  It’s like that thing I’ve heard: Change is not an event, it’s a process.  Or, ya know, the other one:  No one said it would be easy; they said it would be worth it.

 

So the first tool I want to you remember is -  patience.

 

Be patient with yourself and your progress.  Give yourself time.  It’s just not going to happen overnight - anyone who tells you something like that is surely selling something too good to be true. And part of being patient is also being kind.  Be kind to yourself.  Set realistic goals and give yourself credit for all the little things you do along the way.  

 

This goal of yours is great, but maybe we can break it down into meaningful steps.  After all, we’re not going to wait til the end to congratulate you.  Nope, we’re going to find small steps and make sure you give yourself credit when you accomplish them!  

 

<An example of this relating to weight loss is given here but change it up if you have an example for a different type of change>

So maybe you want to lose 30 pounds - great, but that can be daunting to look at the scale day after day, getting obsessed with the stagnating numbers.  So instead, maybe you have goals of cooking a meal at home twice a week, or carrying a water bottle, getting up to walk just 5 minutes every hour, or just putting your fork down in between bites. <chuckle>  I mean they sound small but they’ll add up to change regardless of the scale.  And that’s something to celebrate too!  Go get new work-out clothes or some flowers to treat yourself along the way while you’re steadily working toward your overall goal.

 

Because this is the next tool to remember - practice.  Bad habits are hard to break and building new ones also take time.  So, we practice.  In baby steps.  Start adding things to the routine until we don’t have to focus and concentrate so hard on them - they eventually become second nature.  But first we have to make a plan to practice.

 

And you know what practice makes, right?   Nope, - progress.  Practice makes progress!  That’s what I want you to strive for.  I know it’s not as flashy as being perfect, but damn, it’s a hell of a lot more achievable.  And this year is gonna be all about your achievements, those continuous improvements, getting better, being better.  Not about being perfect...that’s way too much pressure, and terribly overwhelming.  Because, ya know, sometimes people forget that when you practice, when you’re making efforts to change, <almost like you’re sharing a secret> you are allowed to make mistakes!  You are allowed to stumble, to have off days.  So let’s just go ahead and say that’s going to happen and make a plan for what to do next.

 

And this is the final important tool for your success - persistence.  Yes I want you to reach for this goal, I want you to make this change -- because you want it.  But I don’t expect you to be perfect about it and you don’t have to hold yourself to that either.  But it’s about staying motivated and finding a way to stay persistent with it. Try again.  Like they say, success is falling 9 times and getting up 10. Or the whole Edison story...  I know maybe that’s not what you put on your vision board, but that’s all it takes - persistence!  And it probably sounds easier now than it may feel later.  But it’ll be worth it.  You’re worth it.  

 

So you will keep trying. Start again if you have to.  And remember when you need those restarts --- forgive yourself.  You’re only human.  Give yourself a break.  Think about what your best friend, <ahem> this <guy/girl> who’s talking right now, would say.  Or just call me and I’ll remind you!

 

Change is hard, but it's not impossible. And, even if you don’t get 100% of your goal, your progress will always be worth celebrating. You’re doing this for a reason and I believe in you!  I’ll be here if you need me.  We can hold confession on Friday nights and start making inspirational playlists for Mondays!

I’m so proud of you already just for having the courage to start!  So let’s make this a year of you!   Of course there may be some detours along the way, but you’re gonna do great. Just keep these tools handy: be patient, keep practicing, keep getting better, be persistent and I know you’re gonna make all kinds of progress. You got this!  I can’t wait to see what you’re going to do!