We often hold higher ethical standards for others than we do for ourselves, research has proven again. Is there a chance for us to stop judging others?
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Update translated a column by Lancaster University social psychology lecturer Jared Piazza who studies moral judgment, behavior and decision making.
“A few years ago I discovered that my friend was cheating on his partner. This immediately blackened my perception of this person. Then I remembered that I myself did something similar a few years ago. At that time I was in a terrible relationship. However, I continued to cling to beliefs in my exceptional morality. But why was I not so generous towards my friend? And how could I so easily forget my own shortcoming?
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Morality plays a central role in social life. My colleagues and I conducted a series of studies. One of them looks at what character traits people value most, what they pay attention to.
Thus, the majority of respondents want to see their teachers, judges, parents, salesmen and many others around them as honest and fair rather than smart or sociable.
Sufficiently highly moral people who do not possess one of the "moral" traits - perhaps sincere and humble, but unfair - were treated more harshly than competent workers who did not possess one of the "qualities of competence".
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For example, a smart, athletic person who would not be creative.
These results clearly demonstrate the importance of morality and explain why it is so detrimental for politicians to be caught in an immoral act. This is perceived much worse than saying some outright nonsense.
Why is that? The answer might be to suggest that when we evaluate someone's moral character, we are really trying to find out if the person has good intentions towards us. When we evaluate someone's intelligence or sociability, we are trying to find out what these people are capable of in carrying out their good or bad intentions.
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In contrast, we are less attentive to our own moral failures. Like a rubber band, which can only be stretched until it bursts, most of us only violate our own ethical moral codes to a limited extent. And this is what allows us to continue to believe in a moral self. If we “sin” too harshly, covenant faith will be destroyed.
The conclusion of the conducted studies: we all want to see ourselves as ethical people, but from time to time we still succumb to temptation and behave immorally. These moral failures go against our perception of ourselves, and therefore various mental maneuvers are activated to neutralize the threat.
We convince ourselves that the violation is not so critical or remind ourselves of recent good deeds in order to give license to indulge in bad behavior a little. Even men convicted of domestic violence are able to maintain their self-image as moral people, recalling more examples of ethical behavior from their lives than immoral acts, studies show.
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For better or worse, most of us suffer from "ethical amnesia" when it comes to wrongdoing, while memory retains more of the details of our moral accomplishments."