August 24, 2023
Straight from the Pastor’s Heart by Dr.Hernes Abante
2 Timothy 1:5-6: “When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also.
[6] Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands.”
The Apostle Paul in his epistle to Timothy reflects a wonderful method of how he was raised as a child. Timothy was raised by his mother Eunice and his grandmother, Lois. A co-parenting style but with great success because of their common faith in God. Their style of parenting led the young Timothy to fear God and later to serve him. He was raised to prepare him to be used by God.
The work of parenting is, I believe, the most important responsibility and the most difficult as well. It involves the nurturing and the raising of children to become responsible adults. Everything that we do can lead to an act of parenting. Who we are and whatever we say can influence the life of a child under our care. It is important to be aware of this serious responsibility; for the future of our children depends on how we nurture and influence them today.
As parents, we have been chosen by God to perform an important and divine tasks. We are stewards of God assigned to take care of the children He allowed to be with us. Remember that they are God’s, but He has given us the opportunity to enjoy and train them while under our care. We have been tasked to mold and direct them according to His will; according to the path He already planned for them.
Proverbs 22:6 - “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
It is clear in the passage above that God has assigned every child a path to walk on. Our responsibility is to know the way where God is leading them and we have to train them by being mindful of God’s will in their lives. This brings us to an important reality that we should raise our children not for ourselves, but we must raise them for God.
As parents, we always love to see our children follow the same path we took. And too often we raise them according to our expectations and dreams. Sometimes we direct our children consciously or not, to fulfill the dreams and ambitions we failed to reach. No wonder why so many children today are confused about who they are and their purpose in life. The other tendency is we allow them to pursue their own will and live their own lives without proper guidance and not being mindful of God who gave them life.
The work of parenting has changed in our time. Before, it was the sole responsibility of the biological parents, but not anymore today. We now see many children being raised under the care of foster parents, stepparents, and grandparents. We also see a trend giving way to the “parentification of older siblings” to care for their younger siblings due to the absence of parents. With most parents busy working, they do not have the time to be with their children so they hire proxy parents, pseudo-parent, and other caregivers.
Our society has created many kinds of parents; such as umbrella parents, helicopter parents, stealth parents, submarine parents, etc. These are terms that identify different parenting methods that are dangerous to our children.
Multiple parenting has made so many of our children today grow up confused and troubled. One idea that came out and was popularized by a book (“It takes a village to raise a child”), written by a first lady was the idea that children must be raised by a whole village. Being raised that way would include being raised, taught, influenced by many and different kinds of people with different opinions and strong views. It is difficult enough to be raised by 2 parents who cannot agree; how much more to be influenced by a hodge-podge of ideas, standards, and values coming from multiple parent figures within the “village.”
Conclusion:
There is no perfect parent, but we have a perfect Heavenly Father who can teach us by His Word and examples of how to be good and effective parents. We also have the Son of God, who has modeled the obedient and submissive Son. As parents, we need to be firmly standing on the Spiritual foundation that teaches the following:
1. Children are gifts from God for us to enjoy and raise according to His will.
2. Raise our children to live, obey, and serve God. We do not raise them for us.
3. Always raise them “in the Lord.” It means directing them on the trajectory where God wants them to be.
4. Teach our children to love God and to think of others. They came to this world with selfish instincts. It is time to teach them about others.
5. Raise them in the light of eternity. Get out of the way by making them see God more than you.
6. Teach them to trust in God and to pray as soon as they begin to talk. Read the Bible at the same time they start reading.
7. Bring them to church as a family and model faith in them by means of actions.
8. Reinforce good behavior by daily recognizing good manners at home.
9. Enforce the rules consistently and apply proper discipline only when not angry.
10. Assign them age-appropriate responsibilities at home.
Parenting is difficult and with many new challenges ahead; but with God’s help and direction, it can be done, by the Grace of God.