The StarKid Theory
All Team StarKid musicals exist in the same universe
I am an avid fan of StarKid Productions. Over the past few weeks, forged from my sheer love of anything they do, I've been developing a theory that suggests that every StarKid musical takes place in the same universe.
First, I began looking at the similarities between the musicals:
- In every musical, characters say "Gasp!" instead of actually gasping.
- Whenever a character needs to go somewhere, they face the audience and run on the spot.
- They each have an unusual yet somewhat cynical view on religion (in Starship, they believe God is dead. In AVPM they have "wizard God." " etc.)
- Some characters are aware they are in a musical and can communicate with the audience (Aladdin, Ron Weasley, Ja'far etc.)
Here are the current musicals that are available to the public in chronological order:
A Very Potter Musical (2009)Me and My Dick (2009)A Very Potter Sequel (2010)Starship (2011)Holy Musical B@man (2012)A Very Starkid Senior Year in 3D (2012)Twisted (2013)The Trail to Oregon! (2014)ANI: A Parody(2014)Firebringer (2016)
This is the beginning of the StarKid Universe:
The Beginning of Knowledge (ANI: A Parody)
- A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, there was a war of the stars taking place (a Star Wars)
- This advanced civilization had mastered biological engineering and space travel, as shown in the events of ANI: A Parody. They also had created marvellous inventions such as Lego and The Internet.
- During this time period, these space-faring people began searching for other systems to colonize. One of them was our solar system. Another planet was a planet of bug people known as Geonosis
- Originally, they tried colonizing on Mars, where they built a Jedi training school, but soon realised that it was unsuitable for life.
The First Community (Firebringer)
- The advanced civilization then discovered Earth, which was suitable for life. A representative of the space people was sent down to Earth (Chorn) to live in prehistoric America and see if humanity was worthy of ancient power and knowledge.
- However, humanity in its early stages was violent and chaotic. While leaders like Jamilla advocated for logic and duty, Zazzalil preferred belief and devotion.
- Once humanity realised that progress could not be achieved without both, Chorn bestowed the first community of humans with ancient power and knowledge.
Magic (after Firebringer)
- For many years, the first community of people helped develop humanity into prosperity. While science, logic and reasoning helped them understand the world, wishes, dreams and belief helped them improve the world.
- After a while, the first community achieved biological engineering and became supernaturally powered beings. They developed devices to harness their powers, called "wands."
- During the Salem Witch Trials, the first community were denounced as "witches and wizards" and their scientific advancements were deemed as "magic." As a result, they lived in hiding in one place in America, where their community continued to grow and thrive.
- While "the magic people" became a thriving community of innovation and pioneers, the development of the rest of the world became dramatically slower. During this time, the first community invented incredible inventions such as Lego and The Internet, inspired by Chorn and influenced by the Star Wars. However, the rest of the world were trapped in the old-fashioned restraints of the 1800s.
The Land of Prosperity (The Trail To Oregon!)
- By the 18th century, humanity's progress had halted.
- Diseases such as dysentery were rampant.
- While the rest of the world was in shit (literally), there was one state in the world that was rich in scientific discovery; Oregon.
- At one point in history, the rest of humanity learned of Oregon's prosperity and flocked to the land for a better life.
- This was the place where humanity was first gifted with ancient knowledge and power.
- Through biological engineering, the people of Oregon also created humanly-intelligent animals. In order to fund the state, they secretly exported highly intelligent oxen for money. Some of these oxen were deformed as a result of experimentation and could communicate with humans. There were also highly-intelligent sea life, like lobsters, who waged their own mini wars with humanity.
- You see, when the magic people first learned of Chorn healing Grunt's arm, they became inspired and decided to created "magical" barrier around the state to cleanse all ailments and diseases of those who enter (the county line.) This explains the doctor's presence at the border.
- This is also why, when Father/Son/Grandpa crossed the county line after dying of dysentery, they were revived by the ancient healing power of Oregon.
- This means that.....
Living in Hiding (after The Trail To Oregon!)
- After many centuries, the state was overpopulated with ordinary settlers, many of whom were prejudiced against the magic people's ways
- The magic people once again were forced into hiding. They were afraid that if they exposed their magical ways and advanced technology to humanity, they would be rejected.
- However this period of peace did not stay this way for long....
The First Golden Age (Holy Musical B@man!)
- In 2012, during the events of A Very Potter Senior Year, Gilderoy Lockhart travelled back in time and exposed the magic people to humans in the early 1990s.
- To the wizarding world's surprise, humanity accepted them and charged them with defending the world.
- The magic people, as well as enhanced individuals from other planets like Krypton, became known as superheroes and supervillains and began to integrate into modern society. Therefore, they took a new name, to honour their origins in space. They became known as "starkids."
- While most starkids were super powered, a few humans were able to fight crime by being wealthy enough to have access to the starkids’ advanced technology. (Batman) A lot of starkids’ were unhappy with this as they wanted to be special or elite. (Superman)
- This era became known as the First Golden Age. After the formation of The Super Friends, it was the first time that humans and starkids had cooperated with each other.
- But many ordinary people were jealous and tried becoming superheroes and villains of their own; many of them with “shitty” themes. As a result, supervillain crime rate went through the roof.
Nowhere to Go (after Holy Musical B@man)
- The humans blamed the starkids for the rise in crime rate. Like they once predicted, humanity began persecuting them again and they were forced into hiding.
- Little did they know, more starkids were being born around the world as their species began to spread.
- In order to hide, they decided to permanently take on the name "witches and wizards" to honour those persecuted in the Salem Witch Trials
- By 2009, they set up a school for these genetically enhanced individuals, or as they were known back then, witches and wizards....
For a long time, the witches and wizards lived in peace and secrecy. It was during this time they discovered the early concepts of time travel (the time turner), created advanced artificial intelligence (The Hat and Scarfy) and had mastered space travel to visit and take control of the Jedi school on Mars. This was the Second Golden Age for starkids, because it was an era of great prosperity and peace.
Humanity Fights Back (after AVPSY)
- When the humans discovered the wizarding world, the wizards and witches decided to take back the name "starkid"
- The humans tried harnessing the starkids’ technology for their malevolent purposes
- They started using young people in their experiments
- They tried using biological engineering to reproduce starkids of their own, but the experiments had a very different effect on reproductive organs....
Biological Intelligence (Me and My Dick)
- The experiments produced a small community of people with anthropomorphic hearts, dicks and pussies
- These young people tried living their daily life but they were shunned for their reproductive organs (this is why Joey Richter is afraid of introducing Dick to people)
- As a result, the reproductive organs were forced to start their own world and warned any human who discovered it against telling anybody, in fear of persecution.
- Eventually, the starkids discovered this world of dicks and pussies and accepted them and their humans into the fold.
- The starkids were angered at humanity's disregard for life, igniting a war between the races.
Artificial Intelligence (after Me and My Dick)
- The war between the starkids and humans waged for many years, but humanity was worried they would be defeated by the starkids' superior abilities and technology. They tried developing artificial intelligence of their own.
- Since humanity did not have access to the advanced technology of the starkids, the only artificial intelligence they could develop were robots.
- However, because the humans built robots with malevolent intentions, the robots themselves were heartless killing machines. The starkids and the humans were forced to band together when the robots rose and took over the earth.
The Romance (Starship)
- During the 100 year Robot Wars against starkids and humans, The Super Friends were defeated. With nobody to protect them, in order to combat the robots, the humans developed a space agency called G.L.E.E., used for conquering and colonising other planets. The agency was controlled by an evil sultan named Doctor Spaceclaw.
- After the Robot Wars, the world was left in ruins. There was extreme poverty while organisations like G.L.E.E. harboured all the power.
- The agency began sending ordinary humans to other planets like Geonosis in the hope of getting new weaponry to finally crush the starkids.
- You can tell that the crew of Starship are human because they initially bear a prejudice towards things that are different, a lesson commonly taught to humans. It also explains why Up didn't have access to the advanced technology the starkids had that could've saved his balls.
- During the events of Starship, Bug and February fell in love and returned to the starship together. On their many travels across the galaxy, they discovered many different relics, such as an sentient carpet and a lamp containing a god-like being called a Djin.
- When they returned to earth, February and Bug wanted to share these treasures with the poor in order to resolve the socio-economic inequality.
- Eventually, Doctor Spaceclaw discovered the lovers' treachery. Bug and February were forced to seal away the treasures in a cave, in the hope that one day, a good soul who abided by duty and devotion would open it and restore humanity.
- The lovers were captured, experimented on and turned into one golden scarab (a bug.) Therefore only the power of love could open the cave again.
- This means....
The Aftermath (Twisted)
- Humanity finally managed to rebuild the earth into a medieval-like structure with kingdoms and sultans.
- Generations of mating between starkids and humans had cancelled out the starkids' magic abilities.
- This new world order of kingdoms was started by corrupt leaders like Doctor Spaceclaw. Therefore, the world became a superficial place full of privilege and poverty.
- Because humanity had seen the potentially devastating effects science could have during the Robot Wars, people who valued science and logic were shunned (Ja'far)
- When Ja'far discovered the golden scarab, it was not only the uniting of the two halves that opened the cave, but the love that Ja'far had for Scherrezade and The Princess. Because Aladdin didn't love anybody, the relics in the cave turned to lava.
- In the end, Ja'far entrusted the power of sultan to a person who believed in both the value of duty and science and the importance of belief and devotion (The Princess)
The Legacy (after Twisted)
- As prophesised, the Princess led the kingdom and the world into a third Golden Age, where duty and devotion coexisted and peace and equality was finally achieved.
- In this world, the people decided to honour the bravery of their ancestors, such as Harry Potter, Bug, Zazzalil and Batman, by telling their stories through the power of the arts and science.
- This new generation of starkids continue telling their stories to their world, as well as worlds from other galaxies and dimensions (like our own)
- The starkids continue to make our world and millions of others a better place. :)
Timeline of The StarKid Universe:
ANI: A Parody (A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away)
Firebringer (Stone Age)
The Trail To Oregon! (1800s)
Holy Musical B@man (1990s) The First Golden Age
A Very Potter Musical - A Very Potter Senior Year (2009-2012) The Second Golden Age
Me and My Dick (after 2012) Pre-Dark Times
ROBOT WARS (DARK TIMES)
Starship (after The Robot Wars) Dark Times
Twisted (The Third Golden Age)
Thank You For Reading!
By Rachel Thornton