i woke up, not from the uncomfortable mat of plastic shreds i slept on, or even the shrill of the gullen that came to be outside the stead, this time a result of the crescent staining of fungus covering those legs. so often was i jolted awake, the scent potent enough to raise the dead, from an all too unfortunate adjustment while still asleep. those terrible wakeups, among others, were routine and i thought no more of them than why i was allowed such an infection. i got up, habitually rubbed the forms off my eyelids afore catching a view of the outside. i admired the defiant growth mats sent outward into the calm bay, a grimy fingerprint left upon the surface of the sea. i shook off the crustens heldfast overnight to my legs with a wince and groan, watched them permeate the floor, disappearing. i came to dress myself of my only clothe, a worn denim overall. i got no further than my foot inside afore some group of animals slightly larger than myself made their presence known, they peered at me through cracks in my worn container of a home. immediately, i started for the agapely rusted portion of my house, i had hoped to wait them out aneath the mat once into the water. such good luck unraught, i fell over, halted by my uncoordinated state of half-dress, and rode the rusty edge of my window of opportunity with chest bare down onto the floor. not a cry could be heard as the molesting swarm of carrion stormed to my vulnerable flesh. they covered my mouth, held my body down, groped and grabbed at my bleeding chest, while prying, pinning those legs apart, working themselves into me. my only possession, my only buffer tween myself and their savagery, was stripped away and i watched through burning eyes, amid muffled gasps and screams, the animals tear my overall into parts. i imagined it only could worsen, and confirmed such, as each animal sheathed with great expulsions each of their depravities within my body. apatheia steadily brewed itself into being, my body now numb, until they eventually grew listless of me, their sessile toy, or maybe just depleted of their wickedness, and left me as if to die where i laid still on my bloody mat. i accepted the fate granted and chose to stare into the dull sky through eroded allowances in the metal above, and from sun, embraced the only warmth i knew. to be anything else seemed favorable and i longed for change of any sort. perhaps leaving the stead would be the soonest. i rolled over sidely and pressed a scrap of my overall to the red outpour of my chest, and looked out into the sea once more. this time, i no longer admired the ancient network of growthmats, but felt their net cast over myself and all hope foundered. i remembered one day, anns afore, when the stead missionary arrived and spoke so passionately about his lord, about how his lord created everyone, and everything, and the yet even more unbelievable assertion that somehow his lord loved everyone despite being responsible for every form of badness to be found. such lord i rathered to be without, though i admit once requesting help from his lord, in the way i heard was custom, the way of a conversing thought to his lord when alone. but those legs did not care for his lord, it seems, and they only grew more disgusting. those legs, their familiar aching agony, felt like nothing after the animals took to me. i basked in raylight and embraced the apathy while i could. the blood would come to a stop, and i moved to the edge of my mat, sidely of the barnacled and algaecovered wall, feet into the water, my head looking down. i briefly thought of ending my life, but it seemed like a waste to die alone. perhaps you should take others with you. it wouldn't matter what i did, or whose life i ended, afore i ended my own, for i would be dead and nonexistant. could this not be applied to life in general, if the end of all life is assuredly a death of old age, and samely results in nonexistence. such thoughts crossed my mind, as i stared into the water. i felt the heaviness once again come over me. what bad timing. i felt the pain inside my chest, my vision turned black, i knew i would fall forward as my body relinquished control of itself. i wanted to laugh at the unjustice as my face crashed against the cold, and terror gripped my faded mind. i awoke sometime in the dark, starved, i clawed my face to break free from the forms taken overhold my eyes. no forms, i learned painfully, i had only struck eyelid and brow. the floor felt solid where i laid and far removed from the stead. i gave up on trying to see in the blackness, and opted for stumbling about to make out my surroundings. a planked wooden floor alow, wooden wall aside, a crate. i tried opening the crate, but soon gave up. more crates, a wooden wall, a wooden door, taller than myself with no means of opening. another wooden wall, a small table, with food left out. i assumed i was captive, but thankful for food nonetheless, a kind of oily leaf paste, dried nuts, a tinned cup of clean water, unlike anything i had afore. i continued exploring my surroundings and felt the last wooden wall, which led me fullcircle, grossly attested by the scent of my legs on the floorspace alow. i must have been here lengthly, but the food was fresh, so was not simply stowed and forgotten. who was taking care of me. i pictured a kindly mother of sorts who would regularly check up on me, much like in stories of the ancients. thinking these comforting thoughts, i formed a house of my crates and slept inside. i was forced awake as the room shook and the crates fell atop me. the bright light streaming in from the door slots atop caused my head to ache, soon covered my face as i got up. i was still unclothed i realized. it would have been nice to look slightly better for my imaginary mother, but she would enjoy cleaning me all the same. the room was slightly rocking, so it must have been a ship of sorts. with nothing else happening, i quickly fell asleep once more amid my sloppy pile of crates. i awoke as some door slammed shut above me, and through pressing my face against the wall i made out speaking and footsteps. my face turned south as the unknown situation i was in finally dawned. i took stock of my room once more as the talking ceased. my captors had ample opportunity to violate me, but chose not to, and instead fed me. in the face of such optimistic fatality, i chose behaving servily, and calmly sat myself aside my table. the footsteps of one finally raught my door, a slat undone, and swung open to reveal a beardly man of ordinaire height, clad in black, unfamiliar attire loosely strung over hisself. clasped firmly in either hand, i spied a book, metal tools with cloth adjoining, and a vial wrapped of gauze containing blue. as he enters, more equally foreign vials are seen dangling in parallel to his waist. i had experienced healing alchemers afore, it was an awful affair of strange substances, unpleasant scents and tastes, never any healing. his wornly face in front of me showed no sign of treachery as he situated at my table, even leaving my door open ahind all his preparation. with anxiety now high, i considered an escape to be made through my door, but remained to witness the methodic calm alchemer. after everything of his was outlaid on my table, his book opened to a section detailing something concerning legs. in disbelief, i thought back on the missionary, on my request for his lord, on a cure for those legs. the alchemer carely began a marriage tween his varied powders and vials of whatever, i onlooked with tearing eyes, wondering what i had done to receive such attention. he soon outstretched those legs along a carely blade, after the mixing was applied, and scraped the discolored flesh away. it foamed and fizzed, dripped onto my floor, thankly witgout pain. soon different mixings were applied to my soft pink flesh after considerations of his book. my legs had returned to me at last, i sat enveloped with awe of the magic witnessed. now learned of such kindness, i found myself overwhelmed, unable to look the alchemer facely. gauze was wrapped, the blue liquid applied over, which coated the entirety, soon came hard. not a single unpleasant scent was to be known, what a delight by this alone. is this the true nature of the alchemers, unlike all known afore to me. yet, as if distant from his miraculous performance, the alchemer simply intended on leaving, from his recollection of tools, while was left paralyzed of this new joy felt. still unlooking, i could tell another man appeared to my door, i heard him speaking and felt his steps just when the alchemer gets up and makes his leave. my door was shut and i was left alone with the blue casings on my legs. i was crushed from being unable to express my gratitude, to speak outwardly. my precious blue legs filled my mind and i sank into slumber. the pacific rocking of the assumed ship quickly mended all my intermittent wakeups, which i barely recall now, but sounded in my dazing to be from arguments atop. i awoke the following morning as a girl younger than myself appeared at my doorway, holding food and drink. my head outstuck from my cratehouse, caught her in full view, as she happily brought the food to my table and seated herself othersidely. she was very clean, showed a curiousity of me, and seemed content just watching me sleep. i decided to outcrawl from my house. a bad move. my filthy, bloodychested, fully bare body, excepting those funny blue legs of mine, allowed her face an expression showing nothing short of terror. the hapless girl loosed a scream, afore quickly scrambling on all fours out my door. i was disappointed in her reaction to my body, and now having to eat alone, but nonetheless made short work of the food left for me. soon i could make out footsteps coming nearer, and at my door, once opened, saw some clothe thrown inside. i smiled anxiously, laughing inside my head, infernally confused at what kind of ship i had found myself upon. not waiting the offer to be withdrawn, i dressed myself, the earthy poncho and burled breeches proved comfortable, and i waited for another happening of my door. i was entertained by the antic of the girl, but surely clothed i would now be able to stand in her vision. my patience paid off as her previously insufferable curiosity of me returned, and she entered my room and seated herself samely as afore. i thought of myself from her mind, but realized i know just as little of her, and found myself equally intrigued by her presensce. she was slightly shorter than myself, wore a dress of debeige sorts, actual leather footwear, with a seemingly arbitrary assortment and position of metal rings round her fingers, her calamy black hair rode aside her neck in waves. i can't recall ever seeing anyone sinilar in the stead. the first recount of the stead, how long have i been removed from that place, good riddance, or at least i had hoped, as my location still remained a mystery. i brought my attention to the girl once more, and after mutually eyeing each other over, i spoke what i considered a greeting. what she said in return eluded me, but i learned there exists more than one language in the world, and i spoke a vastly limited vocabulary useful only in the stead. perhaps sensing this, she came excited, and a barrage of sounds and pointing all over my room followed. it seemed like a game, which i took to earnestly, and came to repeat after her. eventually she pointed to herself and said alia. alia was her name. i understood. she pointed to myself. i realized what she asked, but i have no such word for myself. with my new understanding of names, i felt inadequate and troubled. once again, as if sensing this, she pointed to me, and reassuringly said iona. i had no idea what iona was. iona, i said, and pointed to myself. an exchange of smiling followed, as i repeatedly said iona. a short while passed and everything in my room was named, a pause followed, i came to stare at her, perhaps a little too carelessly, because she got up to leave my room, closing my door ahind her. alone and now with only my thoughts, i repeatedly thought about iona to myself, and what a fitting name it was. it was a pleasure to speak and tickled my mind in doing so. unusual footsteps interrupted my mantra of iona, heavy footsteps of metal footwear, i envisioned a frightful metallic man approaching my door. i promptly cowered within my house of crates. the metal man unslat my door, and uplifted me of any previous happitude, instead filling me with dread. i tried hard to disappear as the crustens do, to blend into my crates somehow. the pleasant voice of a woman resounded along with the scent of burning something inside my room. shortly after hearing, my fantastical fear of the metal man came to seem unreal. curiosity overwhelmed me, as i poked my head outward from my house. another bad move, i barely managed to dodge the hairy stick thrown to my face, seemingly to the amusement of the woman. she spoke once more, steadily growing nothing but impatience at my behaviour, evident from her kicks to my house. i outwent fully from my crates, kneeled towards the stick, and squarely confronted the transgressor of my homely palace. i took in her appearance with scornful eyes as she continued to spout whatever of that new language afront of me. an elder woman than myself, with dirty long hair and fair skin. amulets, armlets, ringlets aset her bare skin with the familiar drapery of black cloth like the alchemer. the segmented metal encasing her legs offered an explanation for the footsteps earlier. the stick, with it clothly stripped end, previously thrown to me was surely involved with this sudden appearance of hers, and i held it loosely as i stood up. looking downward, she kicked the tinned pail tween us and motioned my stick being placed into it. i tried feeling something other than confusion at this instruction, perhaps overdoing it as i drove it into the pail, letting forth over the room a wave of nasty water. still unsure why i had been instructed to do just that, i received right in my chest a powerful kick from the now drenched angry woman. sent floorly with all breath taken away, i gave up, electing to remain where i fell defeated. it was shortly into my rest, now with eyes shut, which incidentally concerned the woman, who unexpectedly came to my aid, until it was revealed to her i was simply listless without harm. sudden changes of emotion toiled over her face, with some obviously enraged words thrown in for good measure. her hand gripped my hair and forcibly dragged myself out my room. it seemed she finally revealed her true form, the racker of my good tidings, my captor. i was destroyed, no such imaginary mother from afore could ever hope to be found now. shackled by truly divine punishment, i labored according to her crude gestures, until my limbs grew sour, until the floor was thoroughly wetted. i had no idea why i was to be deserving of such a strange and tireful task, but at last an end was found as she sat atop some crates. suffciently pleased with my wet floor, i followed suit, and felt a bond from doing so. she spoke, and known i understood nothing, but perhaps this only allowed her more freedom to say whatever. i caught myself once again staring, but her not minding only allowed me to continue. the metal legs, were they replacement legs or a strange clothe. i mulled over the possibilities and concluded they were simply worn atop her leather breeches. she caught me staring and smiled, she outstretched a leg, bending it all about, tapped it a few times with her banded hand. she spoke with all kinds of exaggerated gestures, often pointing at her legs, until she felt satisfied having offered an incredible, albeit wholly unintelligible, explanation for something. i started to laugh, and said iona, confidently, while pointing to myself. i pointed to her. cesna was her response. i said cesna reaffirmingly, not knowing what such a thing meant, but a deep stroke to my ego regardless. i must be skilled to learn so many things, and to tame the metal man into the womanish comic afore me. she took somethings out her sleeve, held the ends close, and aflame with ease it went, placed after to her lips. what racked my nostrils and drew me aback, what visibly disgusting scent to ahold, only worse came from realizing it came out her own nose. how she could remain stolid while breathing this deadness evaded all my attempts to outfigure, and i gave up, no sooner covering my face of clothe. her laughter told me it was deliberate. with show of face, i once more reclined into crates while ignoring the grossitude. she spoke more, threw whatever glowing onto my still wet floor with a fizz, stood on her metal, and left me samely as the others afore. good riddance foul breather. free now of any obstacle, i wanted to leave the place, but with my territory now expanded to include everything around me previously outraught, i felt a need to rebuild my previous home grander than ever. while considering the structural possibilities of my cratery, a viewport was happened upon, i ventured forth, and admired the plastic inlaid once there, but came unable to believe what lay yonder. outlooking a newframed world, i saught grey sky as usual, and white clouds, but their positions now unending, without water alow, slivers of greenery found naught. how i could not hope to explain the vast expanse of cloudy sky afore my sight, the airship atop all known since, that i now found myself, hence, left me petrified. bakerlegged, toddering aback, i fell floorly, and remained so until i hoped to resume control of my body. i tried to stand, but managed only to kneel on all four. my stomach reversed itself. i collapsed, calmly resting atop my bile, questioning my reality at hand, afore going back in thought, to my falling into the water, and the blackness thereafter. i laughed, my mind surely tricked itself into this grand visage. eyes and mouth openly in awe, i stood, to bear witness to the creative power of my mind. i felt the walls, which were so smoothly textured, and my own face, cold now and wet, but samely. stumbling forth to the exposed stairway, i wanted to explore this fantasy, but the floor started to bend and shake. i ran myself plainly into the wall afore me, falling down amid crates. i laid still as the wood around the room danced about. my head throbbed, and every second that passed allowed the wooden appendages burst from the walls to come nearer. i hid my eyes with both hands pressed shut, and mouth opened to scream, but a shallow breath was all to be had, with a growing heaviness pressing against my chest. i felt the wooden spires pierce my flesh and inject their spiteful seeds. with my hands limp and now parted, i overlook sprouting of the many trees from my flesh, which transformed into the plastic of the ancients. everything faded to blackness and i was once again left adrift in the void.